I'm a puppy and that's okay.

In the last post, I called myself a metaphorical "puppy" because I want to be where the people (and the fun) are and I love getting time and attention from those I care about. (Doesn't everyone, really?)

Yesterday, I was finding fault with myself for being this way--for always wishing a friend or a family member was at least in the room with me. I kept asking myself, "Why can't I be content to be alone? Why do I feel depressed after a day of no time with a close friend? After all, Jesus is here with me!"

I think part of my loneliness is being four months from graduation. Another part of it is that, of my five closest friends at Moody, only four are currently attending, and of those, only one lives on campus. As tough as that can be, it makes me extremely thankful for all the time I spend weekly with my dear friend Emily. We are interning at her church and spend two or three nights a week at her house. But she commutes from home and doesn't live a few doors down the hall like she used to.

And last night, I really missed the time when she did.

But again, I told myself "I need to buck up!! Why do I need people all the time??"

Soon afterward, a thoughtful friend said something like this to me:

We grow up taking the security of a family for granted. Even when they're not interacting with us, they're there. When we leave home, our friends become our family. If they leave or they're not available to us when we need them, we feel their absence strongly.

I think she's right.

I'm too hard on myself about it, but my extroverted, loving nature should be something I'm thankful for. It has its potential--like any disposition--to be unhealthy, but God has already been working in me in that regard.

I'm simply a puppy-kind-of-person who often misses the presence of people I love.

That doesn't mean I don't appreciate God's presence, it just means...I don't know...

I guess it just means I love being with people. And that's a great thing.

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P.S. (That's a great thing especially for the type of missionary position I'm currently applying for: being an RA for high school girls at a Christian boarding school. More to come on that. :))