and said goodbye.
I’m realizing how much I really dislike goodbyes. But...
“Only in the agony of parting do we look into the depths of love.”1
Love.
“How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”2
Over the past week, I heard “I love you” too many times to count. I was told I was beautiful or funny or amazing more than I feel I deserve. I was hugged or kissed more times than I can remember. To me, friends are God’s way of sending me love notes. The stories of my friendships with Madeline, Emily, and Brittany are amazing, and those girls remind me every day that who I am is more than enough. Parting was pretty close to agony, but each goodbye was sweet and memorable in its own way.
Did you ever wish your life was like a movie? Well, mine is. Ask me sometime about the incredible chain of events that led to my friendships with Eden and Madeline...and about nearly missing a train, a broken handle, and running on a wet floor in flip flops with a huge bag over my shoulders. Hmm...and how about that time I was running crying across a dark parking lot in stocking feet... Anyways...chances are, your life is pretty epic too. You just have to know what lens to look through. The best moments are in high-definition when you’re looking through the eyes of love. And if you don’t know how, start with spending love-time with your Creator.
He knows how you work. He knows what you need. He knows what refreshes your heart and makes your days sunny. But to see with His love, you have to know His heart.Knowing God’s heart takes a lifetime...more than a lifetime. You could explore its recesses for eternity and never see it all. But it’s still something we’re called to do on this earth. I’m learning how—slowly. Two people who have helped me immensely are Eric and Leslie Ludy. This week I started reading one of their books, Wrestling Prayer. The book starts with an overview and some “housecleaning” tips. One of the main themes is dying to oneself.
“When you woke up this morning, did you think of your day as belonging to you, or Him? Did you live as if your time and decisions were your own, or His? Did you allow the distractions and allurements of this world to turn your head, to occupy your thoughts, or to dictate your choices? Or was He your sole pursuit? How did you spend your free time? Doing what you felt like doing? Or pouring out your life for Him?”3
Isn’t this the beginning of knowing God’s heart? Your heart beats with His, your breath is His, your hands hold His, your entire life is completely His? When I accepted Jesus Christ, I invited Him into my heart to become my Lord. As I mature, “He must increase, but I must decrease.”4. Jesus indwells our being, and we become but a watermark. “It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me.”5
I want to become a watermark—a transparent imprint through which the glory of my Jesus shines in all its brilliance.
Thinking on this has encouraged me as I get ready to leave for Moody in four days. It is no longer “Rebekah” who has to go to classes…actual classes…with other people!...do homework, get a job, and practice piano two hours a day. I feel completely inadequate to be on my own, but He is able and He’ll be right beside, or rather, inside me!
Bekah and Jesus are going to Chicago.
IN 4 DAYS!!
Arrival is in 7 days. We’re stopping in Ohio to see family and then going to Chicago on the 16th. The 18th is check-in (and meet-your-roommate day)!
This doesn’t seem real.
1. George Elliot
2. Carol Sobieski and Thomas Meehan
3. Wrestling Prayer, Eric and Leslie Ludy
4. John 3:30 NJKV
5. Galatians 2:20 NJKV
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